These Things Take Time

Me singing into a CLEAN toilet brush 1990, Dublin (most likely singing to The Smiths)

So, I went to Chicago last week. I took Thursday and Friday off, and went to stay with my friend Alicia-who I lived with in Ireland all those many years ago-and little did I know that the gig was postponed until I landed at Chicago O'Hare.

Yes, it was cold. My desert skin felt it. Perhaps it sensed my impending doom:

As you know, Morrissey had to postpone the Chicago gig set for Saturday and also had to cancel the Flint, Michigan gig he was due to perform at on Thursday evening because of  a bleeding ulcer and other ailements.

Alicia 1990 (probably singing to American Music Club or REM)

I didn't mind. I haven't seen Alicia in at least a year and even then it was a brief dinner with us here while she was interveiwing for jobs. I think she was actually relieved that there was no gig. She needed a night off from her hectic existence. She is completing a new book, teaching writing at a university, taking care of a four-year-old and a two-year old and maintaining a relationship with her partner. Whew!! Needless to say, she was glad to have someone else there to lend a helping hand.

Alicia now

I met Alicia over twenty years ago in a small office at the University of London, Senate House where we were oddly placed in the same place. I remember filing things my first day and her first question was, "What do you want to do?" (meaning with your life probably) and my answer was to be a writer. Her answer was the same and unlike me she actually became a writer. Alicia had her first novel made into a movie called "Towelhead," directed by Alan Ball, several years ago.

I won't say what became of me except you might gather what happened given that Alicia's writing novels and memoirs and here I am writing a measly blog that I hope somebody in the universe reads!

But nevermind, being with Alicia is strange because I just slip into our relationship which basically picks up where it ended a year ago and several years before that. I think this may be because we had such an intense experience when we moved to Ireland after we met in London.  It is not adivsable to live in Dublin, Ireland with virtually no money or decent job prospects in the early 90s. People thought we were crazy. If only I'd been given a penny for every time someone asked, "What are you doing looking for work here? My brothers and cousins left here to find work in America."  Yet, we were determined to make it work. It was a tragi-comedy if there ever was one.

It sounds kind of selfish to say it was fine for me not to attend the concert, but  poor old Moz was lying around in a hospital having tubes shoved down his throat and having all manner of tests done. There was nothing I could realistically do for him and I had to make the most of it.

Me and Anne (do you like my hat?)

I have another friend who lives in Rockford, just out of Chicago. Her name is Anne and she also teaches college-although she has been on medical leave for a while now. Anne is originally from Taiwan and we became pen pals when we were sixteen. Since that time, Anne has been married and had a son who is now fourteen and she has a new man in her life at this point. I was lucky enough to be able to have lunch with them.

All in all, my trip to Chicago was somewhat simplified by NOT seeing Morrissey. It would have been great, and I was a bit sorry, but it simply gave me time. Just time that I could never have if I had not dreamed of seeing Morrissey perform.

So, not long after I arrived back here in Cali, Morrissey issued a statement:

The reports of my death have been greatly understated. Once admitted to the William Beaumont Hospital at Royal Oak in Michigan, I received treatment for concussion, a bleeding ulcer, and Barrett's esophagus. The positive from all of this is that there are now no known ailments left for me to try.

I am fully determined to resume the tour on February 9 at the Chelsea Ballroom in Las Vegas. If there's an audience of any kind in attendance, I just might die with a smile on my face, after all. If I am not there, I shall probably never again be anywhere.

Equally, I am determined to play Flint (Michigan) if it kills me (which, on the face of it, it almost has.)

Thank you to everyone present at both Brooklyn (New York) and Melbourne (Australia) during recent weeks for two of the best nights of what might charitably be termed my "career". My debt to you will outlive time itself.

pause at my headstone,

MORRISSEY

31 January 2013.

With the mention of Morrissey playing in Las Vegas the old rusty wheels in the brain started spinning and suddenly Roland and I were planning a much deserved weekend getaway to Las Vegas. 

Yet, just yesterday afternoon, we learned that due to doctor's orders Morrissey cannot play Las Vegas this weekend. 

Okay, I'm disappointed. Truly. But Roland and I are still going to Las Vegas. It doesn't mean we can't get away and spend some quality time together. We will attend some other show and return to Las Vegas when Morrissey reschedules. Why not make the most of it?

I swear,  I am one of the most sarcastic people you'll ever meet. Pollyanna is not my name by a long shot. I rarely see the silver lining. But I feel like in some ways the journey to see Morrissey has allowed me to spend some much-needed time with important people in my life. Had I not planned on going to his concerts, I would not have created the opportunity to make these plans. 

Also, when I think about how Morrissey must feel, I think he must be just as disappointed. Very few people in existence know the stress of having to let down so many people-to have so many expecting something that you cannot deliver. It has to be frustrating for him. And stressful. But I think with his medical issue, the best thing is to give it TIME.

It seems inappropriate to thank Morrissey for getting sick so I won't but making plans and not being able to follow through has turned out to have created some great memories.